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How to get along with your flatmates
Posted on behalf of: Abrianna Masri
Last updated: Tuesday, 18 March 2025
This blog post is from Residential Life Connector Abrianna. If you are interested in becoming a Residential Life Connector, applications for next academic year are open until Friday 28 March.
Living on campus can be a daunting yet exciting experience, leaving your hometown, friends and family to a new city filled with so much potential.
Sometimes, once the initial excitement of starting uni wears off, communal living can become more difficult. As a Residential Life Connector, I often talk to students who want a better relationship with their flatmates. If you’ve found that you’ve lived with your flatmates for a while and aren’t getting along with them, here are a few tips to help you:
Nice gestures
Nice gestures always go a long way. You could plan to do something fun with your flatmates, whether it’s have a games night to get to know them, having a movie night, or even something as simple as buying a box of chocolates for everyone to share. Showing that you are interested in getting to know them will go a long way and make them want to get to know you too. Don’t be afraid to make the first move, it’s never too late to put yourself out there!
Showing respect
Keeping kitchen etiquette is so important when living with others, it shows that you respect your flatmates, which is always good when you want to get along with them. Make sure you do the simple things like letting them know when you’re having friends over, cleaning up after yourself and staying civil to avoid disagreements and conflicts.
No assumptions
If something is frustrating you about your flatmates, no matter how obvious you think you’ve made it, if you haven’t said it to them directly they might not know. Clarity of communication is at the heart of most of the conflict we support students with in Residential Life. Try to be open with your conversations and show that you are willing to talk about issues so they don’t build up.
Check up on them
You may be in the situation where one of your flatmates seem distant or is always in their room. Checking up on them and offering to listen to them may help a lot, especially if they feel like they don’t have anyone else to talk to. If you need advice or support, please don’t hesitate to contact the Student Centre or the Residential Life Team for support.
Don’t feel pressured
Don’t feel like you have to force yourself to become best friends with your flatmates, if you find that you don’t really click with them there are so many other ways of making new friends and meeting new people. The best ways are through joining societies, talking to people in your course and attending events like the Residental Life Connector Cafe, a drop in session for all students living on campus, every Wednesday 1pm-3pm, the Student Centre. Even if you aren’t close with your flatmates you can still have a positive living experience with them.
If you are struggling or want to discuss any issues, please feel free to speak with your Residential Life Connector.